When I was but a wee laddy, the idea of lying
was – to me – a bad thing. Lying was a bad thing to do; I shouldn’t do that; I
should strive to tell the truth. As I grew older, I adopted the semi-joke, “I
want to always tell the truth for the simple reason that I’m not smart enough
to keep lies straight.” I recognized that “bearing false witness” was a breach
of The Big Ten, but lying never really hit me as a particularly evil thing to
do. Don’t get me wrong – lying is bad, wrong, and sinful. But it never struck
me as a special evil.
That changed several years back after a
particular class session in seminary. Professor Breshears was speaking on sin
and evil. He had us read one chapter out of “People Of The Lie” by M. ScottPeck. While there are many interesting thoughts that Dr. Peck expresses in this
work, I can’t endorse all of them. However, Dr. Peck’s thesis was that there
existed a kind of human evil that was diagnosable. Evil wasn’t merely being a
psychopath, or a sociopath, but in his experience he had encountered some other
psychological configuration that manifested itself as recognizable evil. Yes,
Dr. Peck asserted, we can psychologically diagnose human evil and it looks like
this: “malignant narcissism.”
The phrase requires us to tease it out.
Starting with “narcissism:” a profound self-centeredness that expects the rest
of the world to shape around the narcissist. OK, sure, we are all pretty
self-centered. But this is more; this is the expectation that no one else really
matters unless they serve the narcissist’s purposes. This can go to the next
level (which we discussed in class) where the narcissist is so self-absorbed
that the rest of the world is expected to yield to whatever s/he says is right
or wrong. That is, the narcissist’s morality itself becomes a function of
it’s-ALL-about-ME.
Next, the word, “malignant.” Now I’ve known
several narcissists during my life. I am one. Several are ‘infantile;’ that is,
they are self-centered but harmless – kind of like a small child who is ‘cute’
in their emotional immaturity. It gets awkward when that happens in a 60
year-old, of course. But there are a few who’s self-centeredness actually
reached out to deliberately harm others. There was an intent to harm, break,
even destroy those who got in the way of the narcissists’ whims.
Just a word, here; this is not completely Dr.
Peck’s description. I’ve taken his work, several discussions, and some
real-world experience to construct this model.
This Malignant Narcissism gets tangled up with
a couple of other ‘phenomena’ (I hate using such sterile words because the
effects on innocent people is so horrible). One of those, as Dr. Peck
described, is a strong tendency to lie … a lot. Remember that a narcissist is
all about themselves. By extension of their self-centeredness, their
reputations are very important. They want to look good. It would be very
difficult for the malignant narcissist to express truly self-deprecating
sentiments. In my world, a malignant narcissist will not truly ‘repent’ of bad
behavior – they may regret the consequences (very emotionally!), but will
strongly resist the notion that they were wrong and need to change. Why?
Because they are IT. They are the standard. And to promote that view of
themselves, they will say things that are not true to continue that façade.
They lie. It becomes a continuous thing. And it certainly does not matter,
much, if their lies might hurt others: ‘better them than me!’
It is not much of a step, then, for the
narcissist to turn malignant and systematically lie to cover up or to turn
people on each other, even former friends. I have seen this happen.
All that (and Dr. Peck’s book is worth picking
up) being said, I have begun to see that lying itself has a corrosive effect on
the soul. With each lie, there is a small death to truth, to reality itself.
OK, here’s where I get a little abstract. I
remember reading a fascinating definition of “truth” in, of all places, a
computer programming manual. The definition equated truth with something that
exists, is real, substantial. To be false is to be empty, non-existent,
nothing. When we lie, we embrace falseness: empty non-existence. When we lie,
we go against real substantial existence. Lying, like most ethical issues, is
much deeper than mere behavior. There is a ‘metaphysical’ phenomena that is
very profound. When you lie, you turn your back on the True, the Real, and even
the Good. When you lie, you walk towards empty nothingness. It’s an
‘existential’ thing.
And if we consider that God is the source of
all life, reality, truth, and good; then to lie is to walk away from God
himself. Which is probably the real issue behind the Ninth Commandment.
Lots of big words there. Summary: Lying is
really Really bad for you. Don’t do it.
